dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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