hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
