I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
