We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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