I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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