I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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