I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
