Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine

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  (617): i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine http://tfl.nu/ryw8
  Replies (33) Good night (834) Bad night (3560)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?

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  (617): My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned? http://tfl.nu/bm6r
  Replies (125) Good night (7794) Bad night (2545)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.

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  (651): whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it. http://tfl.nu/g1hs
  Replies (5) Good night (5599) Bad night (677)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.

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  (304): just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter. http://tfl.nu/doob
  Replies (10) Good night (5314) Bad night (532)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.

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  (616): the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles. http://tfl.nu/0i26
  Replies (13) Good night (3948) Bad night (1152)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Missed another period

  (1-239): View more from Florida

  I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.

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  (239): Missed another period (1-239): I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair. http://tfl.nu/33ef
  Replies (10) Good night (1287) Bad night (3752)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.

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  (305): so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs. http://tfl.nu/ez3t
  Replies (24) Good night (4153) Bad night (1326)
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  (650): View more from California

  dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king

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  (650): dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king http://tfl.nu/ix08
  Replies (12) Good night (5526) Bad night (1024)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level

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  (434): i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level http://tfl.nu/1fd3
  Replies (11) Good night (3026) Bad night (1667)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.

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  (973): That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that. http://tfl.nu/drll
  Replies (13) Good night (2171) Bad night (851)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else

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  (207): we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else http://tfl.nu/gty0
  Replies (5) Good night (1467) Bad night (530)
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  (315): View more from New York

  We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.

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  (315): We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked. http://tfl.nu/mwis
  Replies (4) Good night (1967) Bad night (465)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Hows the party lookin?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party

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  (608): Hows the party lookin? (414): At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party http://tfl.nu/v0wb
  Replies (3) Good night (1081) Bad night (358)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.

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  (847): So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along. http://tfl.nu/d3ni
  Replies (2) Good night (612) Bad night (293)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight

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  (519): I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight http://tfl.nu/pto6
  Replies (0) Good night (382) Bad night (229)

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