Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming

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  (703): my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming http://tfl.nu/nmyq
  Replies (13) Good night (626) Bad night (3574)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again

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  (215): I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again http://tfl.nu/3rrj
  Replies (7) Good night (1147) Bad night (3025)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we

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  (617): We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we http://tfl.nu/nsr3
  Replies (14) Good night (3449) Bad night (683)
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  (682): View more from Texas

  why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?

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  (682): why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube? http://tfl.nu/dci4
  Replies (5) Good night (1154) Bad night (4171)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?

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  (816): She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit? http://tfl.nu/kt2r
  Replies (24) Good night (7401) Bad night (1010)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.

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  (702): she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves. http://tfl.nu/b0kq
  Replies (12) Good night (4131) Bad night (893)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.

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  (513): New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity. http://tfl.nu/ob6h
  Replies (21) Good night (8160) Bad night (927)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.

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  (520): The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears. http://tfl.nu/pc9j
  Replies (11) Good night (2688) Bad night (855)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country

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  (603): went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country http://tfl.nu/gkag
  Replies (8) Good night (5117) Bad night (917)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.

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  (307): I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real. http://tfl.nu/ype2
  Replies (3) Good night (598) Bad night (1154)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.

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  (732): Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish. http://tfl.nu/b0yx
  Replies (7) Good night (646) Bad night (1289)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us

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  (913): i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us http://tfl.nu/7y99
  Replies (6) Good night (529) Bad night (1152)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self

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  (423): Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self http://tfl.nu/t1xo
  Replies (1) Good night (618) Bad night (253)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....

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  (312): Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird.... http://tfl.nu/u9p7
  Replies (1) Good night (298) Bad night (583)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants

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  (615): I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants http://tfl.nu/v0dv
  Replies (0) Good night (631) Bad night (247)

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