Texts From Last Night

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  (804): View more from Virginia

  please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.

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  (804): please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash. http://tfl.nu/od6g
  Replies (5) Good night (716) Bad night (3060)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.

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  (402): i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction. http://tfl.nu/maqc
  Replies (31) Good night (5317) Bad night (580)
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  (858): View more from California

  I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.

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  (858): I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way. http://tfl.nu/w85x
  Replies (26) Good night (15179) Bad night (1211)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.

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  (817): I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts. http://tfl.nu/7tmi
  Replies (36) Good night (9659) Bad night (1249)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.

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  (704): It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie. http://tfl.nu/rp9b
  Replies (8) Good night (4098) Bad night (1136)
• Favorite

  (420): View more from

  The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome

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  (420): The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome http://tfl.nu/b0jj
  Replies (16) Good night (3788) Bad night (962)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.

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  (612): The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable. http://tfl.nu/wu9y
  Replies (20) Good night (3685) Bad night (1398)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.

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  (917): u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds. http://tfl.nu/c4et
  Replies (4) Good night (2944) Bad night (990)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?

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  (757): Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early? http://tfl.nu/0ctz
  Replies (19) Good night (2008) Bad night (760)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?

  (925): View more from California

  Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.

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  (510): This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over? (925): Quite the smooth talker. There in 5. http://tfl.nu/ccg0
  Replies (7) Good night (3323) Bad night (686)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.

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  (204): I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk. http://tfl.nu/i2hd
  Replies (1) Good night (1156) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.

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  (740): Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life. http://tfl.nu/e384
  Replies (6) Good night (1703) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point

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  (512): Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point http://tfl.nu/vgyx
  Replies (1) Good night (774) Bad night (382)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex

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  (207): He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex http://tfl.nu/e8rm
  Replies (0) Good night (555) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"

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  (516): Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?" http://tfl.nu/n5f6
  Replies (1) Good night (487) Bad night (213)

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