We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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