Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"

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  (212): He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances," http://tfl.nu/u663
  Replies (83) Good night (3543) Bad night (2788)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.

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  (778): Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them. http://tfl.nu/fuhs
  Replies (15) Good night (4667) Bad night (731)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.

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  (505): He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes. http://tfl.nu/z1l1
  Replies (25) Good night (676) Bad night (3341)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me

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  (214): I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me http://tfl.nu/9k7n
  Replies (57) Good night (5614) Bad night (922)
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  (805): View more from California

  woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."

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  (805): woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream." http://tfl.nu/w9nn
  Replies (11) Good night (4476) Bad night (946)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree

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  (561): Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree http://tfl.nu/oe6w
  Replies (32) Good night (7967) Bad night (993)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.

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  (970): I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen. http://tfl.nu/rv6x
  Replies (5) Good night (667) Bad night (3811)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk

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  (480): im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk http://tfl.nu/jram
  Replies (6) Good night (5104) Bad night (695)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.

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  (210): The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple. http://tfl.nu/ks4u
  Replies (3) Good night (1272) Bad night (495)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester

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  (770): My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester http://tfl.nu/20yd
  Replies (11) Good night (571) Bad night (2927)
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  (925): View more from California

  Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.

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  (925): Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs. http://tfl.nu/ssx7
  Replies (13) Good night (1765) Bad night (537)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.

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  (214): This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family. http://tfl.nu/r35r
  Replies (4) Good night (290) Bad night (819)
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  (61): View more from Australia

  Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair

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  (61): Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair http://tfl.nu/j3o5
  Replies (6) Good night (448) Bad night (273)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match

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  (303): I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match http://tfl.nu/tsdg
  Replies (1) Good night (539) Bad night (214)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.

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  (330): I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend. http://tfl.nu/a48i
  Replies (1) Good night (562) Bad night (200)

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