only if we run a train.
done.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
