I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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