We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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