You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
