3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Are we still banned from the library?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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