You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
