we have officially lost it.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
