It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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