im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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