The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize