aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
