Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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