so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
