fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
