im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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