covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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