The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
