Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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