next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
