i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
