You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
