He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize