I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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