Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
