i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
