Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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