The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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