It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
