remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize