But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
