my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
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