you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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