At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize