we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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