SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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