I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
