My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I need a burrito and a hug.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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