this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
