I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize