in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
