Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
