This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize