Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I think my moral compass just broke
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
