So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Randomize
