SEEEEXXX PLEASE
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Randomize
